Resources

I've had a post here explaining the lack of posting for the past couple of weeks.

I know this blog is geared toward women keeping their homes, but
last night, we were asked to compile a resource list for some old friends. I thought I would share the list with all you out there in Cyberspace too because some of these resources have greatly influenced my thinking on being a keeper at home. Honestly, these resources have been so invaluable to us, but if both of us had to pick only one resource which has influenced us both more than any one other, it would be Vision Forum. We have ordered approximately 100 CD’s from them as well as downloaded more from Behemoth.com (their site to download their resources).

www.visionforum.com – especially the CD’s for parents from there. The one’s that Steve mentioned by name are “The 200 Year Plan – a Vision for Multi-generational Faithfulness”; “A Homeschooling Vision of Victory”; “The Centrality of the Home in Evangelism and Discipleship”; “Hollywood’s Most Despised Villain”; “The Promise – The Beauty and Glory of the 5th Commandment”; “The Return of the Daughter’s”. The Children’s resources are second to none, but the CD’s are what have shaped our thinking of how we raise our children drastically. I would highly recommend the Jonathan Park creation CD adventures. If you sign up for the mailing list, you'll receive e-mails about really awesome sales on CD bundles. The only thing I would say about it is to stay away from the S.M. Davis CD’s. They don’t only leave a lot to be desired, but also really take things out of context on numerous occasions. I cannot listen to them with the kids in the car unless I've listened to them first because I've had to correct him to the kids on numerous occasions.

http://www.behemoth.com – This is Vision Forum’s downloadable warehouse for much of their audio and video pieces, but it also has tons more!

www.franklinsprings.com – These DVD’s have been such a blessing to us because they are not just entertainment, but encouragement in our Christian and Spiritual walks. Last Christmas we purchased the 10 pack which we have watched over and over and over again!

http://solmusic.ca/ - Jamie Soles is our favorite musician for the kids. They absolutely eat it up! He has both adult and Children’s CD’s. The adult music is very good also.

http://www.titustwo.com – These resources on keeping our children’s hearts, on homeschooling, on scheduling and so much more. We have purchased almost all of their resources.

http://www.amazon.com/Golden-Childrens-Bible-Books/dp/0307165205 - Steve said you asked about our Children’s Bible. It is The Golden Children’s Bible published by A Golden Book, New York. It is good over all. I’ve noticed several things that I wouldn’t have left out even in a children’s Bible, but overall a great resource.

http://www.rodandstaffbooks.com We absolutely adore the readers! Ian and Jordan both enjoy reading them. They are wholesome and about life lived on a farm.

http://www.thefamilyvision.org – This is a free Christian lending library here in St. Louis, but they have just begun a new program where people outside of the area can pay a one-time yearly fee and borrow as many books as they want. This is an INCREDIBLE library. I think you visited it with us the last time you were here. Their books are second to none. They are all strongly focused on what a family should be like and growing Godly families.

http://www.majestymusic.com – While we don’t agree with everything in each of their kids CD’s ( for example - they have one whose theme is the evils of alcohol), they are wholesome, entertaining, teach Christian principles, and the songs are so fun that the kids ask for them a lot.

http://www.parentalrights.org – This has very important information on the Parental Right’s Amendment and preserving our ability as parents to direct our child’s lives.

http://www.moneysavingmom.com – This site has fundamentally changed the way I shop for my family. I pay about half what I used to pay on groceries and I am able to bring more home and donate a TON which I’ve never done before.

http://www.thewordofpromise.com/ - This is the audio Bible of preference for the New Testament. It is dramatized and we really enjoy it. My only beef with it is that it is a Bible reading done by almost exclusively non-Christian’s, but it is done well. They are coming out with an Old – Testament one as well in time. Here is the link to the OT one at Amazon.com http://www.amazon.com/Word-Promise-Testament-Audio-Bible/dp/1418541931/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1243228527&sr=8-2

http://generationswithvision.com/ - Kevin Swanson was at the last homeschool convention here in STL, and he really impressed us with his message. The book “The Second Mayflower” is one that we’d highly recommend as well as “Upgrade”.

http://www.chef-missouri.com/ - While this is a Missouri homeschool site, the group has been invaluable to us.

http://www.theresnoplacelikehome-summers.com/ - This link is not currently working, but I’m hoping it is fixed soon. I bought Candy Summer’s book There’s No Place Like Home when I first started homeschooling. It had a profound influence on my thinking about what a homeschool life looks like. It also didn’t hurt when I found out that we are practically neighbors!

http://www.hslda.org – This stands for Home School Legal Defense Association. We became members this past year. When you join, if there’s ever a problem with a social worker, allegations of neglect, questions about homeschool laws in your state, or the state decides to take legal action against you homeschooling your children, HSLDA will represent you. They also fight to keep homeschooling legal by watching laws that are going through the government at all levels. Just last week, we received an e-mail about a last minute change in law language which would affect Missouri homeschooling. They asked as many as could to show up in Jefferson City (Missouri’s capitol) the following afternoon. 2,500 of us showed up, but only because they are watching things for us. Membership is VERY reasonable at $10 a month or $100/yr., less if you sign on for more years or are in full-time Christian Work.

http://www.veritaspress.com – We use almost all of their recommendations for curriculum, but we have ordered it through the next link because it’s cheaper for almost every item. I would highly, highly recommend you to check out their Phonics Museum reading program. We absolutely loved it! I also highly recommend their History and Bible programs. The only big change I would make to their suggestions is to us Math-U-See instead of Saxon Math.

http://www.rainbowresource.com – If you want to buy anything homeschool wise for the girls, I use other catalogs (as above) for suggestions of what to buy, but order it through here. You have to be careful what you pick out though, because they don’t check their resources to make sure they are evolution free or that they present evolution as a false theory for the beginning of the world.

http://www.naturesworkshop.com – Great resource for nature and exploration ideas!

http://www.exodusbooks.com/category.aspx?id=7320 – Steve said that though Bob and Theresa are Baptist, this is a great way to get theology into their girls. These are the Westminster Shorter Catechism questions put to song. Even Ethan and Shannen sing along with these. All four love them and we have, as a family, memorized up through question number #40 using them.

http://www.nlpg.com/store/NLP.htm - I’ve appreciated this resource because their slogan is “Always Creation – All the Time”. I never have to worry about evolutionary stuff from them. I would stick to the Science books from them though as having ordered one of their other books, it wasn’t at all one that I would recommend for the last days alarmism in a financial book.

To Be Discreet

Discreet has always been one of those words which I knew the general meaning, but never really took the time to look up until now. I would have characterized discreet more along the lines of modest, not calling attention to one actions, careful with words. Since I was writing a post on being discreet, I felt a more precise definition warranted. My preferred dictionary is the Webster's 1828 dictionary. Here is what it said discreet means, "Prudent; wise in avoiding errors or evil, and in selecting the best means to accomplish a purpose; circumspect; cautious; wary; not rash."

Strong's also gives us a great sense of what it means. It gives two definitions, "1. of a sound mind, sane, in one's senses 2. curbing one's desires and impulses, self-controlled, temperate."

When you take a look at Webster's and Strong's together, they are so complimentary to each other! To be discreet implies wisdom (which starts with the fear of the Lord). It implies knowledge and understanding of how situations work, what their pitfalls are and how they can be avoided. Understanding, however, isn't where the meaning for discreet ends. Discreet is carried over into the physical realm of how do we act when we know what is best what to do. We must have self control enough to act on what we have learned either from others or from past failures. It's not enough to know what is the best course of action, but we must have the faith to hold to that best course of action when everything inside us wants to give in!

As women seeking to emulate Titus 2 to those around us, how does that look in our families? It means knowing when to tell our husband our children's short-comings that day and when not to. Another possible example would be, how would a woman of discretion handle a sensitive situation of a miscarriage by a friend? To be discreet means not telling our parents or friends of our husband's latest gaff or mistake, or maybe not even telling our child's latest (albeit funny) gaff or mistake. How would either feel if they knew what we were saying?

One of the absolute best examples of discretion of which I have ever heard is George Washington. During his time as General of the Continental Army there was a General, General Gates, who with several other conspirators was covertly seeking to unseat General Washington. When a friend of Washington's got hold of one of the conspiratorial notes, Washington wrote Gates and simply quoted a short portion of the letter. Without saying anything other than I have read this and enclosing the conspirator's words, he signed it, "Your Obedient Servant, George Washington". Over the next few weeks all of the conspirators came and pledged their fealty to Washington. He sat back and listened as each conspirator told about what he had 'heard' and how he was totally loyal to Washington. He was under no obligation to handle things that way he did. He could have had the men tried and hung for conspiracy, but he didn't. His actions showed discretion in an incredible way.

To Love Their Children

When a cuddly, soft, quiet, precious, little baby is set in your arms for the first time whether it's after a long-hard labor, or as a friend of mine, Ramona, would attest to, holding that baby after a long-hard adoption process, any person would wonder how in the world you couldn't love that child. It just comes naturally!

Well, praise the Lord, sometimes it does! When reality of sleepless nights, obnoxious smelling diapers, total upset of your 'normal' schedule sets in, it's not too hard to see how you might get just slightly upset at a normally cute baby. Or what about those preschoolers. Ever accidentally left a pencil or crayon in the living room while you were cooking dinner in the kitchen? Isn't that look on their face amazingly cute when you walk in and found out they have drawn all over the walls or the books or your Sunday coupons? Then there are the elementary school aged children, who know just enough to get them into trouble - just enough about how to get into paints to make a mess -- just enough about baking to scatter flour on the flour while trying to get it into a bowl -- just enough about a CD, video, or DVD to do something to one as they try to get it to play? I won't comment on the highschoolers as I do not as of yet have them, but you all get the picture.

In Titus 2:4, the phrase "to love their children" is all one word in Greek, it's Philoteknos which according to Strong's Online Concordance means, "loving one's offspring or children," so that didn't help me too much in hoping to unpack the meaning of the phrase for you. The word only occurs once in the New Testament and that is here in Titus 2:4.

Since the Concordance didn't do much for me this one time, I decided to head to my trusty Matthew Henry Commentary. He discusses this phrase in his commentary on Titus thus, "And to love their children, not with a natural affection only, but a spiritual, a love springing from a holy sanctified heart and regulated by the word; not a fond foolish love, indulging them in evil, neglecting due reproof and correction where necessary, but a regular Christian love, showing itself in their pious education, forming their life and manners aright, taking care of their souls as well as of their bodies, of their spiritual welfare as well as of their temporal, of the former chiefly and in the first place. "

That gives us something more to practically sink our teeth into. We have four different aspects by which we should be loving (doing deeds of love) to our children.

We should do love to our children spiritually. Yes, father's are to be the spiritual leaders of the house and yet oftentimes we are the ones with our children more during the day. I know in our case, Steve has delegated morning worship and the task of making sure Ian and Jordan read their chapter in Proverbs of the day to me. And yet that is so small when you compare the ability of walking alongside my children each and every day and getting to speak the Bible into their lives in whatever situation we are in. Maybe someone is being selfish, I should speak verses of generosity into their lives. Perhaps someone was downright mean, I have the obligation to speak verses of kindness into their lives. Perchance someone was acting in anger, I have the duty and great privilege of speaking patience, self-control, and giving the situation over to the Lord into their situation.

We should love our children intellectually. We should educate them, fill their mind with the word and with all good things. We should love them enough to censure them from things that range from partially true and misleading to downright evil. The former end of the spectrum being kept until they are ready to biblically discuss the issue, the latter end of the spectrum never being touched.

We should love them in discipline. We shouldn't neglect the training of their spirits by not reproving their foolish actions and attitudes, while reminding them always that we love them and are seeking their good.

We should love them bodily taking care of their necessary bodily cares such as food, clothing, shelter.

While Matthew Henry didn't mention emotionally loving them, I would again purport that it is cyclical. The more you do love to your children, the more you will feel an emotional bond, so the more you do love toward your children, so the more attached you become to them emotionally. The two things go hand in hand.

To Love Their Husbands

After teaching the younger women to be sober, the second thing that older women are to teach the younger is "to love their husbands". According to Strong's Online Concordance, the greek word for 'love' is philanthrōpia, from which we get our English word philanthropy. In Greek, the word means benevolence, kindess.

I think it's important to note that the word does not mean 'the fuzzy feeling in the pit of our stomach'. As young brides we all have that adoring love of our husband where we just exude how much emotional love we feel. There are two possible reasons that the emotional love isn't mentioned here. The first reason being that emotional love, while not always at the same level, is something that often times comes naturally to us as women. We like that fuzzy feeling The second reason that Paul may not include emotional love in his list is that because when we are doing acts of kindness and goodness, "Philanthrōpia", to our husbands, emotional love will almost inevitably follow. You cannot continue to act in kindness to anyone and remain angry with them in your heart. Doing acts of kindness is to seek their good. In the act of kindness itself it begins to break down the barriers that may have stood in the way of feeling kindness. When you continue to 'do' kindness, and your feeling of kindness continues, emotional love of one sort or another will follow. This is what Proverbs 31 speaks about when it says in verse 12, "She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life." She acts in goodness (benevolence) toward him.

Knowing that when Titus 2 speaks of acting benevolently toward our husbands, how do we go about doing it? I almost want to laugh as the list seems overwhelming in number. We can fix him appealing dinner. We can greet him with a hug and kiss when he comes home after work, we can keep our homes clean and ready for company, we can offer encouragement when he needs it, we can wear nice looking clothes, we can have candles that he enjoys lit for a great smell in the house. There is so much we can do from offering a warm cup of coffee in the morning to offering a playful smile and knowing look in the evening.

For the next week, I'd like to encourage us all to choose one special act of kindness to do toward our husband's and see if that doesn't melt away any barriers that were starting to form, or see if it doesn't make our emotional love for our husbands even stronger.